Human Again.

Another week and only more improvements and gains.

I'm still sober! I feel good and thanks to my best friend Logan it's been making this whole process a lot easier to do because he's planning on being sober for life, and I totally applaud him for it. Being sober isn't easy at all. We tried going out for a bit the other evening and we had to stick to Red Bulls (Sugar Free for me), Seltzer and Limes, and Water all evening. We went to several spots in HK before heading back up-town and going to Suite Bar, which ended up being the perfect spot for us, to chill, not be judged and have a really good time. I'd been there once before with an Ex, but being with a close friend was awesome. We met a few drag queens and one said she'd pay me in booze if I got onstage and took my shirt off during her performance. I declined because although I know it would be fun, I'm not at the comfort level where I'd being willing to just do all of that just yet.

I've become so focused with myself as of late, it's crazy. I've put more energy into ME than I ever have before. I FINALLY did the photo shoot for this Fitness clothing line, and I spend a lot of money on gym clothes, supplements, and prepping for my food during the week. I switched to taking online classes for my certification, but school this semester is just too expensive, and I've got a lot on my plate. I've jumped back into acting...which is great! My overall being feels better.

I tried dating a friend, but I quickly learned that right now if I'm REALLY going to focus on me then being single is what I need to be right now. I look at my schedule and my day to day life and right now I don't know where to fit in a relationship. True, you make time for the things you want, but a relationship has to be something I want. I want a relationship, that fits into my lifestyle, and thats healthy for me and him. I'm coming into myself, and with that I know what I want, how I want it to be, and when I want something, and how to make it work. I've had many a failed relationships with guys, and many them due to me, but I know now that's life, and if I don't see myself being with someone long-term, than I'm not going to try and push something that I know is not there.'

Life is so funny...I'm always figuring out things as they happen to me.

Something I must say I'm proud of is my growth and learning more about who Tyree is, and the changes I've made so far. I don't have to pretend to be perfect, I can be flawed, I can hurt, I can hurt others, I can lie, I can be lied too, I can tell the truth, and I can have the truth be told to me. The most important..I AM HUMAN. I AM HUMAN.

I want to love, and love hard..I miss that feeling.

Until next week!

Much LIGHT!